Ones and Zeros: It turns out we long-hairs are Capitalist Running Dogs..

It turns out we long-hairs are Capitalist Running Dogs..

January 08, 2005

Aunty Beeb listens to the burning social issues as seen on TV in North Korea and reports on a new campaign against capitalist decadent long hair.

...stressed the "negative effects" of long hair on "human intelligence development", noting that long hair "consumes a great deal of nutrition" and could thus rob the brain of energy. Men should get a haircut every 15 days, it recommended.

...or they can let their hair consume a great deal of nutrition. Yes, folks, it's the long-hair diet, lose weight with Dr. Sampson's North Korean Long-Hair Diet, and save time and money, too...

"No matter how good the clothes, if one does not wear tidy shoes, one's personality will be downgraded."--Minju Choson

If you don't tie your shoelaces, you'll be forced to run Personality 3.1.1 for Work Camps. I'm glad the North Koreans are working on the really important issues.

.:Posted by Michael on January 8, 2005 6:27 PM:.

You know, I'd noticed that I just hadn't been thinking as clearly lately. Now I know why. I've been letting my hair grow back out. Thank you for solving my problem!

Thank heavens my shoes are tied.

.:Posted by Amy ( total) on January 9, 2005 9:18 AM:.

Don't thank me, thank Kim Il Jong!

.:Posted by Michael ( total) on January 9, 2005 9:34 AM:.