Local TV newsbag Wayne Dolcefino is promising an uncompromising and hard-hitting "newseriffic" look at Houston area fire inspectors that spend an inordinate amount of time in local strip clubs. My extremities are already sweating in anticipation of lurid hidden camera footage and strategically placed pixelated boxes that so deliciously tease. These are the times that local news programs live for.
So far Dolcefino has, by my informal and unscientific count, conducted unflattering investigative reports on the local police department, Houston city government, and the HISD teachers' union (and probably the DAR and the Girl Scouts). Now it's the fire department's turn - we learned tonight that local inspectors had visited area "adult entertainment establishments" over 267 times last year, and a certain local elementary school not at all.
Sadly, what will be lost in the inevitable pleas that we "think of the children" is Dolcefino's obvious psychological handicap: the man has a death wish.
Investigative reporters ruffle feathers all the time, but Big Wayne doesn't appear ready to stop until he's pissed off everyone in the KTRK viewing area. I'm not sure if the man lives in Houston proper, but if he does, he's managed to anger the local constabulary (with last month's story on cops moonlighting in area bars), the City itself (who assumedly handles his water and sewage), and now the fire department. At the very least, he better make sure he doesn't speed on his way to work.
If that weren't enough, this is the same guy who wades out, during a hurricane, into a chest high floodwaters for no other reason than to say, "Dave, I'm standing here in chest high floodwaters."
I'd say I fear for the guy's safety except, well, I don't really care. His legitimate stories are intermingled with dubious accounts of "made in China" highway lane bumps and cafeteria workers stealing milk. Is it shocking that local fire inspectors are getting lap dances instead of inspecting our local schools? Sure, I guess...if Dolcefino's telling us the whole story. Recent incidents like his bumbling of the Kid-Care fiasco and his blatant lies about the United Way's "One Houston United" telethon for victims of Hurricane Alison make one suspect there's more than a little John Stossel to the guy, however. And it doesn't help that he begins every story by preening in a room full of his Emmys.
It's that time of year, I reckon. And for any of you local TV viewers so hard up for titilation you have to resort to jump cuts of strippers on the evening news, I hear this newfangled internet thing can be used to find pictures of naked women. Don't tell my mom.
Wayne's bio says:"1996 Texas Associated Press Best Investigative Report (Wayne tied himself for this award!)"
I say: "To what or whom?"
Hey dumbass....the reason I am not listed in HCAD is because I dont live in Harris County...but of course a crack know it all like you probably already figured that out. As far as my alleged bungling of the Kid Care story...the last time I checked the founders of the charity were being sued by the state for alleged mismanagment and fraud. Im sorry you dont see the relevance in having fire inspectors making schools a bigger priority than topless bars. I dont go to the places ..so I havent seen you there.
Easy there, tiger. If you're trying to start a battle of wits on this blog, its clear from your flacid grasp of the english language you'll be bringing a pocket knife to a gun fight.
You know it's funny we never hear anything about Wayne himself of investigative reports about the investigators themselves. Things like the child support issue. Remember to put the account number on the check when you send it in. Makes it a lot easier for the child to get the money. Or how about when he was interviewing that deputy at the nightclub and the patrons came out and recognized him the camera suddenly got cut off. One of the females at the club was supposedly with him in Galveston during Mardi Gras and had some interesting stories about their drive back together. Or how about that DWI. Refusing to take a breath test and then having the gall to ask for a hardship license. I bet the Judge laughed about that one. I know all of the bailiffs did. Or how about buying beer while in the KTRK van on Beltway 8 close to Garret Road in November of 2003. Yes Wayne we know of your flaws and we wait patiently with our own cameras. The next DWI will be videotaped with in-car cameras and documented in detail. It isn't a matter of if, just a matter of when.
Either Wayne doesn't live in Houston, he rents, or Dolcefino isn't his real last name. www.hcad.org doesn't have him listed.