The Compaq Center, formerly known as the Summit, is ceasing operation as a sports/special event arena this year. This Saturday, ZZ Top will help close the place down by playing the final (rock) concert in the arena:
Saturday's last ZZ Top show at the now-named Compaq Center will be followed by Disney on Ice Nov. 26-30. The building then will become home to Lakewood Church and be renamed Lakewood International Center.
I admit to being a bit stupefied when I heard Lakewood, a Houston-based Charismatic Church, was moving into the Compaq Center (under a 60-year lease, no less). I didn't realize at the time that they regularly fill up their current 7,800 seat facility for each service, or that an estimated 30,000 parishoners attend each week. Sermons are also broadcast across America and to some 100 countries worldwide.
Which leads to a logistical question: what kind of ceremony has to be performed to adequately consecrate the site of the new Lakewood International Center? Leaving aside the question of whether or not any violent crimes have been committed there (those Aeros-Grizzlies games would get pretty bloody, at least), does one just move into a venue that has hosted the likes of Black Sabbath, Testament, and Megadeth without at least sprinkling some holy water around?
Lakewood's an interesting organization. Their congregation is celebrated for its diversity and original pastor John Osteen was actually ousted from the Southern Baptists for not being fire and brimstone enough, which is all fine and good. Still, the wording on the church's web page regarding their plans for the future are a little...disquieting:
It has always been Lakewood's destiny to be on the front lines, and our greatest opportunity stands before us.
Never in our history have we had a greater opportunity to make an impact on the nations of the earth… Will you be part of history?
Then there's this:
The greatest challenge in the history of Lakewood is before us. We can stay where we are, or we can move ahead into a "promised land" where our vision for ministry can sweep this world.
Maybe I'm reading all this too close to the anniversary of the Jonestown massacre, but it sure sounds to me like Lakewood is about to implement "Phase II" of Operation Global Fellowship...Or Else.
I, for one, welcome our Protestant overlords.
Another comment: 10 years ago I'd have said 'Holy Cripes, I have GOT to be there when ZZ Top closes the Summit down'. I think I've basically moved beyond the enjoyment of ZZ Top, though. I've been to 3 concerts and liked 'em, I've owned the albums, I've waved to Beard who was gassing up The Car at a gas station near my old house, but I don't feel like I like the music any more. When 'Sharp Dressed Man' comes on the radio I'll usually change channels, not because I hate it but because I've heard it before.
I have mixed feelings about the place going away. I've been to a bunch of concerts (the best was the 'Big Generator' tour by Yes), a number of Rockets games, several conventions, two circuses and one marching band competition (don't ask), and while that represents a bunch of memories, the venue basically always sucked.
I just hope this doesn't mean the Greenway Plaza theater will stop showing them thar foreign films where you kin see the ladies' nekkid parts.
I know that there are elaborate ceremonies regarding the consecration of a new Roman Catholic church. I have no idea if there are similar ceremonies for Protestant churches. I would expect, given the more fluid doctrinal nature of a generic Christian church like Lakewood, that there would be as much or as little ceremony as the pastor desired.
I do doubt, however, that there is any specific requirement to expiate prior bad acts that may have been performed in the location. I doubt that dogma says that a place becomes unholy due to unholy acts. To make a place unholy, you'd probably have to affirmatively consecrate it to an unholy purpose.
Good Fark reference, Pete. Intentional or not.
This must represent a new direction for a Charismatic church. With all the beer they can serve at that place, you could have a bunch of really hammered people at the service. You won't know if I'm speaking in tongues or loaded. Or both.
On a serious level, this concerns me because it is going to step that much closer to "performance church". Making it more about the messenger than the message. Just another baby step toward theocracy.
(*shudder*)
"affirmatively consecrate it to an unholy purpose"
Depends on if Deicide or Venom ever played there, I guess.
I've seen dozens of Aeros games, the circus, and quite a few concerts at the Summit/Compaq Center. I don't think I'll miss it too much. Sporting events cost too damn much and I don't dig on arena shows anymore.
And, as H...etc. has already noted, the venue sucks.
The whole "I, for one, welcome our new *.* overlords". Its a recurring theme on Fark. (And a hex on you for introducing me to that site. No more time for online porn.) Anyway, maybe you are referring to the same thing the Farkers are.
It's originally a Simpsons quote. Like all things Fark, it has been lifted from elsewhere and used to the brink of unfunniness. All your cliches are belong to us.
Aha. No, I was quoting Kent Brockman in "Deep Space Homer." After Homer accidentally frees the ant colony aboard the spacecraft, the onboard video broadcasts a magnified image of an ant back to Earth.
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Kent: Ladies and gentlemen, er, we've just lost the picture, but, uh, what we've seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecraft has been taken over -- "conquered", if you will -- by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive earth men or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain, there is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here.
And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.
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Farkers do have a penchant for overkill, but that's part of what makes the Photoshop threads so fun.
"affirmatively consecrate it to an unholy purpose"
I'd just like to assure folks that not only do I write like that, I also speak like that.
I did not trust Osteen the Elder, and I still do not trust Osteen the Younger.
These statements are based 100% on their teeth. Nobody should have teeth like that.