I'm convinced the cinematic version of the comic book Hellblazer, "Constantine," will be pretty grim, and not in the cool Darren Aronofsky way. However, if casting Keanu Reeves as the blond, British magus John Constantine, setting the film in Los Angeles instead of London, and giving the traditionally non-driving Constantine a vehicle overstimulated your filmic gag reflex, perhaps the casting of Peter Stormare as Satan (subscription required) will act as a tonic of sorts:
Peter Stormare will portray Satan in Warner Bros. Pictures' "Constantine."
Satan is the arch-enemy of mystical troubleshooter John Constantine, who is portrayed by the pic's star, Keanu Reeves. Kevin Brodbin, Mark Bomback and Frank Cappello adapted the script from the DC Comics property.
Cappello wrote the Hulk Hogan smash (Hulk smash?) "Suburban Commando." While Kevin Brodbin graced us with the Steven Seagal/Keenen Ivory Wayans actioner "The Glimmer Man." So, you know, we've got that going for us.
If they're actually hewing somewhat closely to the "Dangerous Habits" story arc, and if Stormare will be playing the First of the Fallen, I wonder how hard it would be to get Steve Buscemi and William H. Macy to play the Second and the Third?
Because at this point, that's what it'll take to get me to buy a ticket.
I think they should use Peter Sellers as Satan. A little digital "Forrest Gump" magic, a few outtakes from 'Being There', and no one has to know he's returned from the dead.
Wake me up when someone does a good job of bringing Frank Miller's Sin City to life.