So, how upset are teenage boys these days at that "Don't Tell Me" song by Avril Lavigne? I had the misfortune of hearing it this weekend, and while I was moved by her power chord empowerment message, I've got to think that most high school guys are less than pleased with the resultant effect on the female population.
Don't think that your charm
And the fact that your arm
Is now around my neck,
Will get you in my pants
I'll have to kick your ass
And make you never forget
Buck up, little campers. That's what your dad's old Playboys are for.
Avril's one of the current Clear Channel darlings, which is why I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for a counterpoint from the likes of L'il Kim. Adolescent males who aren't at the top of the food chain from a reproductive perspective (most of them) need all the help they can get, but it's looking more and more like we're going to have a repeat of the dreaded Barren Backseat Crisis of '87, when girls across the country took their make-out cues from the Georgia Satellties' "Keep Your Hands to Yourself" and nary a third base was stolen for months.
REMINDER: I'm taking submissions for my all-important blog bio page (see below). There's still time for you to help me avoid doing any work on it myself.
Pete, I hope you reread this blog entry when your little girl is ready to date. That Barren Backseat Crisis of '87 might not sound too bad when your baby is riding in her date's car.
Funny, 'cause Sheena ended up right where one might guess, Vegas, baby!