A Perfectly Cromulent Blog

Can't stop the music

I don't post much on the weekends. This is where I should tell you about all the fun I have during that time and how I'm not chained to my computer like I am most weeknights, but that wouldn't be entirely accurate. Mostly it's because I like a break from eyestrain and impending carpal tunnel syndrome.

On some occasions, I am actually doing something fun. And the reason I didn't bring it up earlier is because my brain was still percolating yesterday from the events of Friday night.

For you see, Friday night was karaoke night.

I can count on one hand the number of time I've participated in karaoke. I can carry a tune, but until I find a place that offers me a chance to sing "California Uber Alles," the sidelines are where I'll remain. Usually. This time, I went with some friends to Genji, a restaurant/sake bar/karaoke joint here in town. Now, sake and I are not on friendly terms. I endured the second worst hangover of my life several years ago after a party there for my birthday. I still had a bottle or two this time (which contributed to my participation in a rousing version of "How Deep Is Your Love" by the Bee Gees), but switched to beer after that. Perhaps I shouldn't have done so, because that would have made the incident in question easier to laugh off as alcohol-induced fever dream.

I speak of the Korean gentleman who sang a song by the German metal band Helloween.

Helloween were one of a multitude of bands who enjoyed some manner of success during the '80s Hair Band Golden Age. I was familiar with them, but couldn't tell you the names of most of their songs. For that reason, I can't tell you what the song was the gentleman in question sang. Could've been "Future World," or "A Little Time," or something else entirely. The band's still around, after all, so maybe the guy was offering something of a more recent vintage. All I know is that the guy had an extremely limited grasp of the English language (which, when you're talking about taking a stab at a song written bu gentlemen whose primary language is German, presents an interesting scenario), and - to put it politely - vocalized about as well as Linda McCartney.

Bad singers are nothing new to karaoke. Hell, they're practically mandatory, but this guy was in a stratum previously undetected. I felt bad, because I'd been introduced to him earlier and thought he was quite a nice dude. But wow. Just wow.

So, anyone wondering where I've been the last two days now knows the answer: I was sitting in my bedroom, staring at the ceilings, and marveling at the rich tapestry of human existence.

And drinking a lot.