Bad TV Ponderings is an infrequent look at low quality television. This is not a redundant expression.
What's that you say? Making fun of AI is old hat? Out of date? Too 2003? Could be you're right, and mostly because the sorry Gong Show-Star Search amalgam itself offers so many avenues for ridicule, such as:
1. Simon Cowell - Along with Anne Robinson, he single-handedly necessitated Tony Blair's personal intervention to keep our two great countries from going to war
2. Ryan Seacrest - Any ABC execs who caught his embarrassing turn on last night's Dick-less New Year's Rockin' Eve are probably telegraphing Cayman bank account numbers in order to get Clark a new baboon heart
3. William Hung - The closest ABC could get to having a recurring character who says nothing but "Me rikey flied lice."
4. Clay Aiken - Who says gay nerds are doomed to obscurity and heartbreak?
5. Paula Abdul - A tone deaf former Laker Girl giving singing critiques is almost as embarrassing as a 265-pound Texas psychiatrist and friend of Oprah giving weight loss advice
The show itself is quite the phenomenon. When auditions came to Houston, delusional wannabes camped out under the Highway 59 overpass for days waiting for their chance to be humiliated. Even so, I thought the popularity of AI would fade out in time. Imagine my surprise when I discovered the very reason I felt sure the show's days were numbered is now being twisted around to suit Fox's nefarious agenda, and is the primary reason for this screed.
I didn't know how many people lined up to have the cold water of reality thrown into their faces, so I looked it up: 100,000. In seven cities. Some were willing volunteers, others dragged there by parents unwilling to believe what most talent agents had already told them about their unspectacular offspring, and I suspect a growing contingent consist of people showing up to do the worst job possible in the hopes of making the initial abuse reel.
What bugs me is the promo showing judge Randy Jackson describing how this season will feature the best talent the show has ever featured. How the hell is that possible? Logic would seem to dictate that the "best" our country had to offer would already have made the cuts the first three years. Those left would then consist of those who didn't make the cut all the other times they tried.
This, along with the return of Las Vegas and The Bachelorette, are what TV viewers have to look forward to in the coming months. Happy new year.
I can hold my head high and proclaim I have never, ever watched an installment of AI! Yeah, I rule! Besides, Nanny 911 and Wife Swap are infinitely superior and much easier on the ears.
I love how they've tried marketing William Hung like a modern day Tiny Tim.
What I can't figure out is if he's in on the joke. Part of me thinks that he has to be; however, if you listen to his cds and or watch his "inspirational video" (apparently, I have no shame, taste, and/or pride), he seems serious to the point of abject arrogance.
At least Tiny Tim was self-effacing and genuinely sincere in his love for music.