Finally, a way to avoid coming up with something original. As seen at Big Stupid Tommy's, here comes the High School Interrogatory:
What year was it?
Mid-1980's. Graduated in 1987.
What were your three favorite bands (performers)?
Queen, R.E.M., and the Replacements.
What was your favorite outfit?
Jams and either my Fundamentally Oral Bill or "Kiss Me, I'm Irish" t-shirt. I also had a pair of orange Converse high-tops liberally held together with duct tape.
And I have no regrets about sacrificing my chances with the opposite sex for comfort. Not many, anyway.
What was up with your hair?
I experimented with all the '80s classics: the Corey Hart, the Vince Neil, and the Robert Smith. Thanks to my hair's Freida-like natural curliness, they all seemed to morph into the 1977-era Don Henley.
Who were your best friends?
Infrequent commenters peenman, seadogsinc, and a guy who has now found Jesus in such a way that it's pretty much necessitated his complete severing of ties with yours truly. Our friendship was forged in the kind of alcoholic bond familiar to anyone growing up in towns where the biggest event of any given week is going down to the river and starting fires.
What did you do after school?
Marching band. Fuck you, I was drum major.
Where did you work?
Phew, lessee: a joint in the mall that sold baked potatoes, then McDonald's, then Double Dave's pizza, then Kroger. I tried unsuccessfully for years to get a job at Hasting's, but my Don Henley haircut probably held me back.
Did you take the bus?
Nope. Peenman's brother gave me a ride my freshman year, our student body president my sophomore year. After that, I had my sweet '75 Buick LeSabre Custom. The Brown Battleship would serve me well for three whole years.
Who did you have a crush on?
What, should I go alphabetically? I didn't really learn how to be an asshole, relationship-wise, until college, so there was no lack of young women who had no idea of my existence during those four excruciating years.
That's not entirely true, I guess. Between 10th and 11th grade, I somehow managed to gain 5 or 6 inches in height and get contact lenses, and that helped.
We had a pretty active D&D campaign going, however. And that eats up a lot of social time.
Did you fight with your parents?
I was experiencing a Bacardi-induced blackout during the biggest fight I had with my mother, but I don't think that counts (I had to hear about it after the fact from my sister).
My parents had an interesting theory on curfews. Starting at the age of 16, I got to stay out until 2 AM on weekends. Pretty cool, right? Not really, especially considering all of my friends had to be by midnight, at the latest. After dropping everyone off, I didn't really have anywhere else to go, so I was usually home by 12:30.
That doesn't have anything to do with the fight question, I guess.
Who did you have a CELEBRITY crush on?
Elisabeth Shue in The Karate Kid or Diane Lane in Streets of Fire.
Did you smoke cigarettes?
Started when I was 18. Took me forever to quit.
Did you lug all of your books around in your backpack all day because you were too nervous to find your locker?
What the hell does that mean? I took a course notebook and a notebook of whatever science fiction comic masterpiece we were working on at the time.
Did you have a ‘clique’?
Yeah, the Social Retards. We had jackets and everything.
Did you have “The Max” like Zach, Kelly, and Slater?
Pepe's, now closed, was where everyone congregated on the weekends to find out where that evening's binge-drinking fest was located. And you could get three tacos for a dollar.
Admit it, were you popular?
As noted, I was drum major of the marching band. This means that if the band is at the bottom of the high school coolness hierarchy, I was at the top of that. In other words, I was the most recognizable person in the group that none of the cool kids would talk to.
Who did you want to be just like?
Tommy already took Batman, so I'd have to say Lance Corporal Hicks from Aliens.
What did you want to be when you grew up?
While I told everyone I wanted to be a writer, I really wanted to be Optimus Prime.
Where did you think you’d be at the age you are now?
Long dead. Honestly, I didn't think we, as a civilization, would make it out of the '80s alive. Imagine my consternation when the Berlin Wall came down and I had to actually start seriously planning for my future.
Goddamed Gorbachev.
My god, was EVERYONE in the marching band (I was also in concert band, how 'bout that!)? Or is it just everyone who has a blog? What do all the people who were cool in high school do now to pass the time? Drink to glory days gone by, when they were cool, before the crush of reality hit them and they realized they peaked at 18 and it's all down hill from there?
Wow. Where did THAT come from?
The Hastings on Texas Ave.? Screw 'em! Did Marooned exist yet?
I'm thinking of taking this quiz... but I'll type in "Home-Schooled: N/A" (not actually true) for each of those questions rather than go through that meat-grinder. Jebus!
And you call yourselves band geeks. I was in marching band, concert band, jazz ensemble, choir, choristers, orchestra and German band. Amateurs. Anyway, I believe someone needs to puncture SuzanH's little fantasy balloon about the cool people in high school. They're still cool, they're in charge, and once they find out we're blogging behind their backs, they're going to give us a giant cyber-wedgie.
The Hastings on Texas Ave.? Screw 'em! Did Marooned exist yet?
Shit. El Chico didn't even exist yet.
"Yeah, the Social Retards. We had jackets and everything." Pete, you cutie, I love that candor. If you were unmarried and I were ten years younger, unmarried, living in Houston....Oh Hell, you get the picture.
I love reading these things. :-)
And I was a drill team nerd in one of the few Houston-area high schools that had a military style drum & bugle corps drill team.
A classic blog, Pete. I applaud you for not naming names, and would argue that your Brown Battleship deserves its own homage on this blog.
No mention of Opus or anything from Bloom County though
awwww. we marching band geeks have to stick together, don't we? (although i was color guard my senior year, which had much less dorky uniforms.)