May 25, 2005

Grill or be grilled

Posted by pete at May 25, 2005 6:50 AM

A good friend of mine (with access to such things) recently found himself with some 16" schedule 40 pipe (previously used for steam, in case anyone was worried), a welder, and some free time. Having apparently grown sick of my coming over to his house to eat his BBQ, he decided to put a grill together for me:

grill 004.jpg

It's four feet long, with twin stacks coming out (you can't see the near one due to my shoddy camera skills). I'm assured it can cook four or five largish briskets, eight racks of ribs, or about 800 chickens. The fire box, visible beneath, is 22" x 22".

Obviously, it still needs to be buffed down, seasoned, and painted. We should have the frame set up by this weekend, and if all goes well I'll be roasting flesh by Memorial Day.

Now it just needs a name.

That is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
I am speechless.

--Posted by peenman on May 25, 2005 7:52 AM

A good name, hmmm? "The Incinerator," too Monster Garage. "The Chef," too folksy. "Lil Smoky," already taken. "Auschwitz," just poor taste. How about "What time on Monday?"

--Posted by basshole on May 25, 2005 8:02 AM

"The Col. Kilgore". Obviously.

--Posted by ajay on May 25, 2005 8:23 AM

I think it's a tossup between 'Alferd' and 'Raoul'. For obvious reasons.

--Posted by HWRNMNBSOL on May 25, 2005 9:02 AM

Come to think of it, you can keep your home-cooked meat. I've got a sudden hankering for a burger from Carl's, Jr.

--Posted by basshole on May 25, 2005 9:10 AM

"The HMS Ingrid Newkirk"

--Posted by Laurence Simon on May 25, 2005 9:14 AM

PETA
Ingrid Newkirk should take a look at this grill Pete is trying to name. Yeah, based on the "Holocaust on a Plate" campaign, I'm sure she'd call it Auschwitz.......
--Posted to The Dead Pool on May 25, 2005 9:17 AM:.

Taste the meat, not the tetanus.

Name: "The Tanning Booth"

--Posted by norbizness on May 25, 2005 9:28 AM

Hmnnn... How about 'The Chosen One'?

Oh, and we were thinking about charring some meat on monday as well and inviting some people over- perhaps we should pool our efforts?

--Posted by MikeD on May 25, 2005 9:31 AM

"Magilla Grilla"

--Posted by Jason on May 25, 2005 11:47 AM

"Solyent Grill"

--Posted by Michael on May 25, 2005 11:49 AM

"Grandpa went to heaven and all I got was this used iron lung."

--Posted by Michael on May 25, 2005 11:51 AM

The Jimi Hindenburg Experience?


--Posted by Danil on May 25, 2005 11:52 AM

"The Pollute-o-matic"

--Posted by Michael on May 25, 2005 11:52 AM

"On a good day, you can still taste bits of Jimmy Hoffa"

--Posted by Michael on May 25, 2005 11:53 AM

"No time to cook now, you can plump in my stomach..." But that perhaps is a bit unwieldy.

I am in awe, sir, of your grillaphone. Methinks it capable of rendering an entire boar into the most deliquescent of flesh, yea bones and all.

--Posted by ez reader on May 25, 2005 11:54 AM

That is indeed a good friend. I stand in awe (and envy) at your BBQ device.

--Posted by verplanck colvin on May 25, 2005 12:33 PM

You people with backyards are starting to piss me off. Actually it is quite beautiful and if I ever get back to Texas I expect to see this baby in action no matter what the weather.

It reminds me of one of the scariest things I have ever seen in my diving career: a single person recompression chamber. It looked like a metal coffin with a small glass viewing port at eye level so that when you come to after blacking out from the bends all you can see is a little bit of light. Of course it was stored in the dark blackness of the ship's hold, so not much chance of a lot of light. I never pressed the dive tables on during that project.

Anyway, ideas for a name: Meat Coffin, The Tube, Smokey Joe's Submarine, The Horizontal Inferno, Torpedo Jim, The Hell Pit, etc. etc.

--Posted by seadogs on May 25, 2005 1:44 PM

I rather like the Mad Max post-apocalyptic look. Therefore, you should leave the exterior as it is and sloppily lable it "Property of Bartertown BBQ".

--Posted by Uh... Josh on May 25, 2005 1:52 PM

basshole is always in the mood for Carl JR's and Mike D, the thought of a pooled effort for Memorial Day has me a little hot and bothered. I hope this come to fruition.

--Posted by Steve on May 25, 2005 2:12 PM

seadogs is on the right track. It definitely has the WWII vintage submarine look. You could call it Das Boot, or perhaps Crazy Ivan.

--Posted by HWRNMNBSOL on May 25, 2005 2:44 PM

Pete,
That is one damn fine looking piece of bbq ordinance you've got there. I was gonna try and come up with some witty name for it, but frankly Property of Bartertown BBQ and Grandpa's Iron Lung beat anything I came up with.

--Posted by Rob on May 25, 2005 5:27 PM

"The Burninator," or "My Meat is Flavored with Rust."

--Posted by Paul on May 26, 2005 10:25 AM

"La chingada parrillada"

--Posted by cacafuego on May 26, 2005 1:43 PM

Grillzilla

--Posted by Tom S on May 26, 2005 9:00 PM

ooh, ooh, another vote for 'the burninator'.

--Posted by verplanck on May 26, 2005 10:53 PM

The only question I have is who is gonna cook? You? Congratulations my friend on aquiring something truly worthy of "Pit Envy". Which might be a good name....

--Posted by Macinfla on May 27, 2005 9:08 AM

It smokes! It smokes!

I'm not sure I can improve on some of the great names for this Thing of Beauty. Magilla Grilla? The Jimi Hindenburg Experience? Heh.

The Flaming Pit of Hell

Breath o' Satan

A Thing of BTU-ty is a Joy Forever

--Posted by Elisson on May 31, 2005 4:14 PM

Don't paint it! It's perfect the way it is!

--Posted by Anne Arkham on May 31, 2005 5:44 PM



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