June 22, 2005
At least we're not "crawling with crackheads and debutantes"
Posted by pete at June 22, 2005 9:23 AM
When House Majority Leader Tom DeLay sat down with reporters on Tuesday on Capitol Hill, he was asked to assess President Bush's campaign in Iraq and to respond to criticism that the military mission is not going well and the White House needs to develop an exit strategy.
DeLay offered this response: "These things take time and they take a long time, and some people get weary of the constant barrage that we see in the media.
"You know, if Houston, Texas, was held to the same standard as Iraq is held to, nobody'd go to Houston, because all this reporting coming out of the local press in Houston is violence, murders, robberies, deaths on the highways," DeLay said.
Scanning the front page of the Houston Chronicle for local stories:
"Lack of rain could have area in severe drought within 2 weeks" - Yes, not being able to water my lawn is infinitely more intimidating than a suicide car bombing that killed 23 people yesterday.
"Woman looking for her date finds three bodies" - Hey, it's a city of five million people. We gots murders.
"Perry apologizes for the 'inappropriate' word" - Those open mikes are a motherfucker, Rick.
"Molotov cocktails lobbed at Westside High School" - Mullah, please. Two of them bounced off a door. Don't call al-Zarqawi, boys: he'll call you.
"Teen who collapsed in court had heart condition" - Could it have been brought on by Houston's notoriously bad air? Or a biological agent? I'm sure Tom will get to the bottom of this.
"Contested Pasadena council race: Best of six?" - Pasadena voters must look pretty ridiculous by now, what with ink on almost all their fingers.
"Jury finds felon guilty in policeman's shooting" - How many of the "felons" shooting policeman in Baghdad have been caught lately, much less tried in a court of law?
"Slaying suspect surrenders in move arranged by Quanell X" - Quanell X is what passes for an "Islamic extremist" in Houston. Pretty scary, I know.
"Critics want voice in toll road planning process" - And yet, no commissioners were assassinated. Sunni constitutional committee members in Iraq aren't quite so lucky.
Wait, he's still talking.
"And if you took that as the image of what is a great city that has an incredible quality of life and an incredible economy, it's amazing to me. Go to Iraq. And see what's actually happening there.
Is it safe to travel outside the Green Zone yet, Tom? Because your implication is that the quality of life and economy of Iraq are comparable to that of Houston, and I haven't needed to wear my flak jacket or take an armored convoy to the mall for, oh, a couple of months now.
Of course, one of the main reasons people are afraid to come to Houston is because Tom Delay lives in such close proximity. It keeps me up at night sometimes, I tell you what.
Is Houston a big tourism destination to begin with?
Bigger than Iraq, I would think.
And DeLay was talking about how local media apparently reports on nothing but gory tales of bloodlust and road rage. As far as actual science-like statistics go, Houston's 2004 violent crime rate was down %2.34 from 2003.
Houston is not the first city that comes to mind when people think of tourist destination, although this city has a lot to offer.
Houston has been working on its image and getting the word out about all we have to offer and it certainly doesn't help to have Tom DeLay over exaggerating what is essentially life in a big city.
Cheers Pete. Well done.
And that al-Zarqawi line cracks me up everytime I read it!
To my dismay, a web search shows that the lyrics of the Houston Proud song aren't out there, at all, period. I think people are mostly afraid to come to Houston because they don't know the song. As a service to my former home, here they are (from memory, anybody who knows them better please feel free to correct):
Some of us were born in this city on the bayou,
and some of us came lookin' for the sun!
We believe there's no place better,
that's why we call it home
and every one of us is Houston Proud!
My favorite is the reminder of all the reasons to stay away from this oppressive swamp as brought to you by the good folks trying to promote Houston tourism at www.houstonitsworthit.com.
Don't let anyone tell you otherwise- Houston is a sweaty fucking armpit of a city. First chance I get, I will kiss this nasty little city goodbye (and I've been telling myself that for 6 years....).
Of course, I'd choose Houston over Dallas any day of the week. Probably the best thing that Houston has going for it is that it isn't College Station. Blech.
I can't really talk, seeing as how "The Mile-High City" has a pretty piss-poor PR department itself, but "Houston, It's Worth It" has GOT to be the lamest catchphrase for a city, ever.
Yeah, Come to Houston! It will have been worth the drive/flight/seven-day walk from the border/forcible kidnapping!
Apparently, Tom DeLay has been taking the same stupid pills as Rick Perry: "You know, if Houston, Texas, was held......
| --Posted to Off the Kuff on Jun 22, 2005 4:13 PM:. |
I saw this in the Comical and felt an overpowering urge to annoy the Mayor's office. The gist of the call was (a) they were totally unaware of what DeLay had said and (b) couldn't understand why a comment from the Mayor might be in order.
Sheesh. And I actually thought White was more clueful than the idiot he succeeded.
Nope, he's just more able to keep the city under ridiculous amounts of construction with all of his contrater buddies.
Y'know, I think DeLay is right....if only those damned reporters would just report the good stuff...like ....uh...fewer people died in suicide bomber explosions this month. Or.....uh...only 40% more of the infrastructure to go. Maybe this would work, American approval rating up 15% in Iraq to post war high of 18%.
Reporters should just be more positive.
Houston's gotta be better than New York, MikeD. U;ve been telling myself the same thing you have for about the same amount of time... and yet here I still sit in the world's most self-absorbed city. Wanna trade?
Is Houston a big tourism destination to begin with? I mean I would imagine between the oppressive heat and the total lack of interesting landmarks and/or natural beauty that Tom Delay is right to say that if people actually paid attention to crime statistics, they'd stay away in droves.