This doesn't quite qualify as a panhandler story, because the kids in question were actually collecting money for a school-related function. I just found their...attitude fairly amusing.
So I'm going into Cactus Records for something (probably to drool over the boxed sets), and a couple of young black teenagers (wasn't that a band?) selling M&Ms or some such come up to me:
Kid #1: Excuse me sir, but we're selling candy to help our basketball team go to a tournament in Dallas.
Pete: I'm sorry guys, I don't have any cash.
This was actually a true statement. I remember the days of selling crap for high school groups, and how much it sucked, so I generally try to help out. On this particular occasion, however, I didn't have a dime. So I headed into the store.
Kid #1: Okay, thanks anyway.
Kid #2 [angrily]: I bet if it was for hockey you'd have the money.
That stopped me short, and I checked to make sure I didn't have my Aeros t-shirt on. Nope. Hot damn, that kid just racially profiled me.
I turned around.
Pete: What the hell did you say?
Kid #2: Nothing.
Pete: Look, goddammit. I don't have any money. I don't care if you're out here for basketball, hockey, or Australian rules football. I'm tapped.
Kid #1: Sorry.
I turned to go back into the store. I wasn't sure if they felt guilty or not, but I was having uncharacteristic remorse for snapping at the kid, who probably had been standing out there all day while yuppie shmucks like me walked in and out without giving them a thin dime.
Still, I have a reputation to maintain, so over my shoulder, I said:
But if it was for hockey, I'd go to the ATM.
Okay, not really. I do wish I'd thought of it at the time, however.
I'll have to remember that witty (and profane) repartee for when "She Who Shall Not Be Named" hits up Grandpa for the Synchronized Swimming Team.
You could also have turned around and said brightly, "But I'll tell you what, I think we can do a little business if you have any crack!"
What were you doing in Cactus? I recall them being overpriced, though the box sets in the cage are drool-inspiring.
What were you doing in Cactus?
Buying some Grateful Dead. What else?
There's nothing wrong with the Dead; except the smelly losers who act(ed) like following them around was a respectable profession.
No, Mr. Salty, I meant why were you shopping for music at Cactus? Their prices always seemed excessive.
They are a bit pricey, but name me another place in town where I can find Killing Joke, the Rhino "Golden Throats" compilation, and the Mermen under one roof.
And yes, I'm aware they're all available online. That's boring. Besides, I'd rather support a local, independently owned music store than I would Amazon.com.
If you ever run into a guy named Scott in there with salt-and-pepper sideburns, tell him that he's a Pavement-lovin' douchebag poser for me.
So when will your car be outta the shop, Pete?
At least Pete mentions hockey in this funny story.......
| --Posted to Rocket Jones on Aug 13, 2005 10:44 AM:. |
I try not to give money to bums as a rule unless they give some kind of performance.