A Perfectly Cromulent Blog

"Now they'll never save your brain, Hitler"

California Nazis. I hate California Nazis:

Thirteen-year-old twins Lamb and Lynx Gaede have one album out, another on the way, a music video, and lots of fans.

They may remind you another famous pair of singers, the Olsen Twins, and the girls say they like that. But unlike the Olsens, who built a media empire on their fun-loving, squeaky-clean image, Lamb and Lynx are cultivating a much darker personna. They are white nationalists and use their talents to preach a message of hate.

Known as "Prussian Blue" — a nod to their German heritage and bright blue eyes — the girls from Bakersfield, Calif., have been performing songs about white nationalism before all-white crowds since they were nine.

An all-white crowd in Bakersfield. Like that's a tough proposition.

Congratulations to the white supremacists. It only took you 14 years (Blood in the Face, which is where I first heard the idea put forth, came out in 1991) to raise some cute teenaged girls to put an attractive face on your ideology. Maybe in another decade and a half you can assemble an all-male group that doesn't cop the overcompensating closet case look.

"We're proud of being white, we want to keep being white," said Lynx. "We want our people to stay white … we don't want to just be, you know, a big muddle. We just want to preserve our race."

Trust me, you don't need to sing White Power ballads to "keep being white." Short of joining the Blue Man Group or getting the wrong color blood in a transfusion, I'm pretty sure the girls will stay Caucasian for the rest of their lives.

As for the alleged disadvantages of "muddling" our racial purity, I frankly wish there was a little Guatemelan or Vietnamese in my background. Maybe then my predominantly German-Irish digestive system could handle something spicier than corned beef and cabbage or Braunschweiger.

Lynx and Lamb have been nurtured on racist beliefs since birth by their mother April. "They need to have the background to understand why certain things are happening," said April, a stay-at-home mom who no longer lives with the twins' father. "I'm going to give them, give them my opinion just like any, any parent would."

April home-schools the girls, teaching them her own unique perspective on everything from current to historical events. In addition, April's father surrounds the family with symbols of his beliefs — specifically the Nazi swastika. It appears on his belt buckle, on the side of his pick-up truck and he's even registered it as his cattle brand with the Bureau of Livestock Identification.

What is it about home schooling that attracts the fundamentalist and the bigot? Oh right, it allows them to shield their kids from anything that might make them realize Mom and Dad are full of shit.

And a swastika on the pickup? Finally, Chevy and Ford owners have a common cause to rally against.

Songs like "Sacrifice" — a tribute to Nazi Rudolf Hess, Hitler's deputy Fuhrer — clearly show the effect of the girls' upbringing. The lyrics praise Hess as a "man of peace who wouldn't give up."

"It really breaks my heart to see those two girls spewing out that kind of garbage," said Ted Shaw, civil rights advocate and president of the NAACP's Legal Defense Fund — though Shaw points out that the girls aren't espousing their own opinions but ones they're being taught.

C'mon...Hess parachuted into Scotland to try and convince Britain to let Germany fight the Soviet Union unmolested. That the man had slightly more respect for the lives of the English over those of the heathen Communists hardly makes him a pacifist.

And while I agree with Shaw to a point, these kids are getting to the age where they need to start questioning what they've been taught. I find it horrible that they've been brought up the way they have, but if they're ever going to free themselves from Mom's brainwashing, now's the time.

Seen at Blog d'Elisson