Though I have yet to figure out which one:

One of the Great Old Ones, most likely. These are right up Azathoth's alley. Regardless, I shall be scanning my grocery shelves in the coming weeks for my first bag spicy fried curtain rings.
[as seen on delicate flower)
Those Funyuns seem to be blowing away the competition.
Slogan: "Are you XTREME enough to handle WASABI FUNYUNS unintended SIDE-EFFECTS, like three CONSECUTIVE days of SPICY FLATULENCE?!?"
Those have been out forever, at least here in Hawaii. They're just now trickling down to Texas?
hey pete, they are available in abundance on the UT campus. if you can't find any in houston (!), let me know and i'll grab a few bags for you here.
Ohhh I've had the wasabi funyuns, they are most delicious.
Pete! Send me some, they haven't made it to Bar Harbor yet!
Hell no, man. That's straight Cthulhu.
Or ... maybe the Flying Spaghetti Monster ... that's a toss up.