I kicked shooed my first frog of the year off the porch last night, which means...that's right, I get to recycle one of my old posts again.
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Spring and summer are frog season in these parts, and while not exactly on the same decibel level as cicadas, the little bastards can be loud. When we moved into out first non-apartment housing several years ago, I began hunting around for solutions to the racket that sprang up outside our bedroom window every night.
The following conversation - between myself and a Houston Garden Center employee - actually took place and is, to the best of my memory, accurate:
PVH: What did you say these things are called again?
HGCE: Rio Grande chirping frogs. They're a Houston-specific variant.
PVH: Gotcha.
HGCE: What were you looking for, exactly?
PVH: I just want something to make them avoid the area right under my bedroom window, if you've got anything like that.
HGCE: Uh huh.
PVH: I don't want to kill them, necessarily, but something that..I don't know...drives them into the neighbor's yard would be fine.
HGCE: Have you tried rotenone?
PVH: No, what's that?
HGCE: Well, adding it to any standing water will essentially make the water unlivable, which will drive the frogs out.
PVH: I see.
HGCE: Did you ever see the movie Creature from the Black Lagoon?
PVH: [blinking] Uh yes, actually.
HGCE: Well, they used rotenone to capture the Creature.
PVH: ...
HGCE: And he was an amphibian.
PVH: I'll take it.
It worked, too. Who would've suspected that all the answers to modern man's pest control problems could be found in 1950's horror movies?
If only there was something to help me with my mantis infestation...
I seem to recall one year in College Station in the early 80s when there was a tiny frog population explosion. For a week or two, you couldn't walk outside without crunching a few of the little guys. Ring a bell?
Yeah, but how effective is it against the . . .
ZOMBIE FROGS!?
That's outstanding. If you're ever besieged by giant rampaging rabbits, be sure to consult the DeForrest Kelly classic Night of the Lepus. Or, I suppose, Jimmy Stewart's Harvey.