September 24, 2008
Et tu, Jorge?
Posted by pete at September 24, 2008 5:10 PMAs if the events of the preceding weeks weren't enough, the one possible bright spot in this shitty month was making it to the championship game in my fantasy baseball league this last Sunday. Riding a powerhouse lineup consisting of (among others) Josh Hamilton, Chase Utley, Jose Reyes, and Brandon Webb, I had cruised to a 16-8 record and was set to take my place in the fantasy firmament against a dude I'd already beaten twice during the season.
Unfortunately, not even bravura performances by Kevin Kouzmanoff and Brad Lidge (yes, that Brad Lidge) good stave off my opponent. I blame Jon Lester and Edison Volquez - who admirably shit the bed in their respective starts - and myself, who neglected to start Jorge Cantu at 1B ahead of Aubrey Huff. Cantu had 74 points, Huff had 18.5. The result?
I won't comment on the additional ignominy that comes from losing to a guy who names his team "Teabag."
Hehe - Teabags. Classic.
teabag?….must be some crazy anti-longhorn reference I bet…(I am a girl, I do not know the other references).
You deserve to get beat with a name like demonios azul,
just because its in spanish doesn’t mean its cool.
your friend, una “talon de brea” del Carolina.
P.S. Your family was in my family’s prayers during the storm and continues to be as you rebuild. Dad is pulling some sufi mystic stuff right now.
Back on Sept 3, The Editors over at The Poor Man (thepoorman.net) had this to say about fantasy football:
I almost forgot the most important thing: shut the fuck up about ‘fantasy football’. I fucking hate ‘fantasy football’. I hate people who have ‘fantasy football’ ‘teams’. If you have a ‘fantasy football’ ‘team’, I hope terrible things happen to you. I hope every ‘fantasy football’ ‘team’ finishes in dead last place. (I neither know nor care if that is actually possible, I merely hope that’s how things turn out in my ‘fantasy schadenfreude’ league.) I hope D&D nerds brutally blackjack you with velvet bags full of polyhedral dice. I hope gangs of compulsive masturbators break into your ‘fantasy draft room’ and crumple your ‘fantasy depth charts’ into dust with their overdeveloped abductor pollicis muscles. I hope all sorts dreadful and poetically justified violence happens to you, and I hope you wash up, bloody and beaten, on the shores of Fantasy Island in Hell. And then I hope Herve Villechaize and and Ricardo Montalban take turns whipping football-sized horse turds at your face for all eternity and asking you if you are enjoying your ‘Football Fan-tasy’. FOREVER!! You horrible, horrible, horrible assholes.And get better fantasies.
I’m not saying I agree, because, you know, fuck it, I’m a sword & sorcery low fantasy roleplayer myself (angelfire.com/rpg2/worldofempire is the campaign; been GMing it since 1986 or thereabouts, off and on), but I love it when that guy starts spraying spittle.
Besides, fantasy BASEball is probably entirely different.