This conversation came up last night while The Wife and I were discussing men she might leave me for, a discussion that occurs often enough to make me question marrying a woman who used to regale me with fun facts she learned in her Marital Property Law class.
The Wife: What was that guy's name you went to grad school with? With the glasses?
Me: That narrows it down.
TW: You went to hockey games with him.
Me: George [not his real name]?
TW: Yeah, he was cute.
Me: For a pervert, sure. The guy had an encyclopedic knowledge of pornography, and this was pre-internet.
TW: If it isn't illegal and doesn't affect me, what do I care what he looks at?
Me: Reeeaaallly...
TW: [hastily] As long as it isn't too weird.
Me: Aha. Define "weird."
TW: I don't know...tentacle stuff, bestiality...freaky shit.
Me: What about scat?
TW: Definitely not.
Me: I mean, being German it's kind of a cultural requirement.
TW: Nein.
Me: Okay, okay. Hey, remind me later that I need to delete my browser history.
I'd like to assure any grandparental units reading this that She Who Shall Not Be Named was safely upstairs playing put of earshot during this inappropriate exchange.
SOooo…if TW doesn’t care, I guess you’re IN for the porno convention in Vegas next January!!! It’s the new Sundance!! You’ll need a break and you can tell TW that it’s a learning experience in how to keep your 3 girls OFF the pole!